Looking Forward to 2014

What a year! While I do agree that there were many blessed events and happy times to remember in all of our lives...there have certainly been real tragedies and losses plus the normal ups and downs in family life and what goes on with our friends. We would have to bite a collective bullet if forced to relive 2013.

As Americans, we have survived blow after blow....and just when we didn't know how we were going to stand up, just to  be knocked in the dirt again,  Phil Robertson showed us that you just do it.

You flat out just do it --because it is right. 

It is right to stand up for what you believe.  It is ok to be true to yourself...true to your faith and not care what anyone besides the good Lord thinks.

Read somewhere how scientists took a bunch of lab rats and frustrated them....now rats are quite the little problem-solvers if left to their own devices and given time to think. But, in this experiment, the floor of the cage was equipped with enough voltage to painfully shock them as they attempted to work out a solution to all the problems put before them.  There was yummy food for the taking, if they solved the problem. The layout was rigged so if they went this direction, they got shocked. If they turned and went another, they would get  another shock.

Therefore, the problems were never resolved due to the little fellows being painfully  knocked down at every try they made. (I am an animal-person. I say that even a rat has a sense of justice and what is right.) At the end of the gruesome experiment, you know what the little Ratties  did when their efforts were foiled at every turn? 

They simply lay down on the floor of the cage...they couldn't fight it anymore. They all quit trying, lost their will to fight for what they wanted....they all laid down and just gave up.

Just like those Ratties, we wanted to see things set right....one problem followed another and then was followed by another...a battering ram made of the craziest problems to ever come down the pike.  We  tried everything in what was left of our power...(all the wrong people had the real power we needed to equalize the game)...yep, we tried to solve the new thing that popped up almost on a daily basis...if talking about it could have solved it, been home free!! 

There came a time when we began to see many of us were traumatized and not bothering to get up after the latest blow to our once good senses. 

My thanks in 2013 to a faithful brother in the Lord who proved that if you keep God in the equation, you will have the leverage you need to solve the problem.  You can remain strong and true to yourself and the values you adhere to... and have no fear of those who show no mercy...who know not a loving Heavenly Father.

Our prayer focus should be for God to touch the hearts of the "mad scientists" who are in control of our nation....show them the path of righteousness....or give us all the guts to show our righteous anger and take our country back!

Have a safe and fun New Year's Eve!

Stormy will be in surgery early in the morning for repair to her knee from an accident at school. Prayers for her a quick and good recovery will be appreciated.

Happy New Year!

Heart is Back in Whack!

Hi, Y'all...summer heat got the best of me as I was cleaning up my beloved eighteen wheeler for possible sale ...or to be put to work if I find a driver. Toying with the idea of re-opening my trucking company.  Healthwise, I may cannot make it happen.  Spent a few days in local hospital getting my heart back in whack last week.  Thanks be to God for modern meds...Betapace is my friend!

Thursday took delivery of my top of the line, four wheel WALKER. Having been declared "disabled and will never work again"...these words so got my goat that I have held that phrase at arm's length like you would "stink bait" for a trot-line. 

I need hip and back surgery plus an abdominal  hernia repaired....got it climbing on tankers and have worked with it like that for 3 years....torn rotator cuff  since about the same time which has almost repaired itself.  Cannot do any of those surgeries  until heart thing is squared away.

My trucking career has been reduced to sitting in a chair and looking at my truck in the driveway. I hate to give up the profession I loved so much.  The next book I am publishing is about a trucker who knows where all the good places to eat are to be found....and a good selection of fishing holes along the way.

Yep, I got a walker.  It is a fine one...hand brakes, a little seat across the middle and the nicest shade of deep purple you can imagine...and, hey: there is even a patch of  red reflective tape on the frame. I guess I can walk to town without fear of someone rear-ending my rear-end!

We got word Friday morning that John's Dad, age 94,  had a stroke and Crestpark Retirement Inn  got him to the hospital.  John was able to go be at his bedside and I am home with Gabe on call to get me to my doctor appointments.  Such depressing events...I had not even checked to see if my books are selling for fear of more depressing news..

Well, let me share what I found on my Reviews...this little lady, Loralu James Conville,  has reaffirmed that I must keep the faith....love all God's children and not sweat the small stuff that I think may hinder me.

She gave me a 5 star rating too...that pleased me so very much.  Word is that this review is part of what sells a book.  I need more reviews but so far I am blessed that these good reviews are written by exemplary people and their opinions are generous and kind. Thanks be to God for all the good people in my life in these crazy days of forced retirement from trucking.

Here is my latest review of  JAKE:

*****  (5 out of 5 stars!)
Shared Heartbreak, June 26, 2013

By 

Loralu James Conville "Old Lady Athlete" (Ruston, LA, USA) 

Amazon Verified Purchase(What's this?)

This review is from: Jake (Kindle Edition)

The heartbreak of the unthinkable ---our child being injured so drastically that we loose them-while their body is physically present with us--and the years of watching that body fade until they take their final leave from us. Marion, bears her soul--and gives the recount from a mother's eyes of her son, Jake and his injury and slow leave taking. We see more and more TBI, and know of those that live with the consequences daily as they caretake their loved one, but few are brave enough to share their story. A must read for those that are experiencing this in their life, but also for those that have lost a child, as well as those that are experiencing grief of any type. Read one mother's story of how she endured the heartbreak and what would sustain her during those long days. This is well written, insightful, and told with poignant truthfulness of the life altering and forever present tragedy of loosing a child--far too early.

I am so flattered but feel so understood....

Hey, Y'all...Ruston author, MaryLou Cheatham reviewed my book about JAKE. (I wanted her input not only because she is a writer and I aspire to be....but also since she was a nurse here in our town when Jake was hurt.) She watched us go through "all that" and grieved for us...I knew she was aware of things that we were not experienced enough to know. 

I want to say that if I ever have need of a therapist again, I will see if she is "for hire"....she has read JAKE...and in this review, she touches on "things" that help me understand how and why I finally found the strength to write of our tragedy.

Please read what she has written....I think it is helpful to anyone who stops here to read her words even if  never getting around to reading my JAKE.  Thank you, Marylou Cheatham; you are generous, gracious and loving.  God bless you and yours.


A Beautiful Songbird Sings Again June 5, 2013

By 'MaryLou Cheatham VINE™ VOICE

Format:Kindle Edition

Jake

In every life grief comes, but all of us are surprised when it slams us. We can't talk much about it when we are in the deep mire of it.

At some point - it's different for every grieving soul - we become able to yank our grief out of ourselves long enough to analyze it before it slips back into the fiber we're made of. We don't ever lose it, but it wears down enough that we are in charge of it. We grow comfortable with it, actually, because it's ours in its unique way.

Once we reach that point of acceptance in our grief, we can help others who are wading through the muddy pathways of life, where there are few perceptible landmarks. Marion McCann has reached that place. Because she has known such sorrow and loss, she has waited years to write this book.

Those of us - the ones who know her as a friend, admire her as a woman, and appreciate the writing talent she has demonstrated as an entertaining columnist in the Ruston Daily Leader -- realized the Lord would lead her to share some of her story eventually . . . that she'd offer comfort to other hurting souls.

Marion tells of premonitions she had before tragedy struck her family, but she had no idea how challenging life would be. How much more of God's love we know once we've lived through the times we would have found impossible if we'd known about them before they happened!

Her ebook JAKE not only delivers the emotional impact of what her family has gone through; it has valuable information about traumatic brain injury. Her family has fought this battle twice. As an RN, I love the way she has explained what happened in laymen's terms. It is educational for all of us. Over the years she has acquired an impressive amount of knowledge and understanding about TBI. She opens her heart here and shares her interactions with her family. Most of all it is a testimony of the way God has moved in her life.

I highly recommend this book to those who have suffered TBI, those whose loved ones have gone through injuries, nursing students, counselors, and people walking through grief. If you don't fall into any of those categories, I recommend you read it because Marion has a fun style of writing.

Am going to try my hand at being a writer.  JAKE was released on Amazon.com in the eBook department on May 8, 2013.  So far, two people have reviewed it and thankfully they gave the book a 5 star rating.  I will post the reviews for you here so you don't have to go research the location...

Customer Reviews:

 

5 out of 5 stars
Gone but not forgotten 

By Daniele Sherrill 

Format:Kindle Edition|Amazon  

 

Awesome book. I am a Registered Nurse and firmly believe it is compelling stories such as this that brings more education to families, than any doctor, therapist,etc.... May this book touch all those who have or had a loved one who suffers/suffered from TBI and may it help them to find hope and faith in The Lord.

 

 

 

5 out of 5 stars
 An awesome story of one family's struggle to cope with Traumatic Brain Injury! 


By Carol H. Gilmer
Format:Kindle Edition|Amazon   Verified Purchase

This was a mesmerizing read! I am an RN who spent many years in critical care. As I read this story, it so took me back to the times of being at the bedside and caring for such a patient. Over the years, I cared for many patients like Jake! Critical Care Nursing is more than the mechanics of doing an exemplary job of caring for that patient; it is the emotional rending of your inner self, as you interact with the family, deal with their interpersonal relationships, their pain, and their grief. All exact a heavy toll upon the nurse at the bedside. This book brought all those times back to me.....my reasons for commitment to such a task, and my reasons for later career changes. Though my nursing skills could stack up to the best of critical care nurses, my experiences left me emotionally broken. To remain the nurse I trained to be, with the empathy needed to render the best of care, I had to leave my first love in nursing behind and move forward. The other choice would have been to become callous, hard, and uncaring; that was simply unacceptable! Thank God and providence that I had an opportunity to move into other work that helped me to maintain my caring attitude and give my soul a rest! As much as I loved it, I would not have consciously made the decision to leave critical care; I thank God for other opportunities that, again, have made me whole! I can only imagine what a family must feel in times like these; I can see why a book like this would be of help to families who are dealing with a brain-injured loved one. As a nurse and a mother, It is definitely a read I would recommend.

 

NOTE:  Thank you two ladies for your good reviews of my book and for the good feeling that maybe the tragedy we have gone through as a family will help another struggling family make it through the worst of times.

--Marion

Five Years Later...

The computer is in the same spot in my office...although I have been "Out of the Office" pounding up and down the nation's highways since 2008 after the last Blog entry instead of pounding the keyboard; it all comes back like not forgetting how to ride a bike.


What brings me back is that I have too much time on my hands...thank you Congestive Heart Failure and all the pressure that caused it to develope... I still have a lot to say...and will keep the blogs short this time...because I just don't feel the best these days.


More times a week, I glance in my mirror and see my grandmother staring back at me...I really need to put some color on this grey hair...it is not even pretty grey hair but looking like the coat of a possum to me...how did I get so old and not remember how I got here...it has been a busy few years...too busy.


One of my old classmates has long been touting the principle of stopping long enough to smell the roses...maybe I will now that I have this inconvenient heart issue...which frankly speaking also concerns me...one of my favorite writers, Lewis Grizzard, died of it.


Writing is good therapy...so is the beauty of all outdoors on a sunny day after the rains have washed away the pollen.


Will get my walker and go outside, observe and think how nice it is to be living in the homeplace of my youth. John has planted pretty pansies in every pot and the edge of the flower bed that runs the length of the 3 huge old plate-glass windows on the lake side...it is 65 degrees and will drop to a low of 49....even little details such as temperature intrique me as I adjust from being on the run so many years.


Hope all my friends are safe and having a good day wherever you are.

Personal Geography By Marion McCann

Personal Geography By Marion McCann

No one ever says life is fair. Day to day life in this world is an ever-flowing stream....and then it stops and you die. In the meantime, seize the day! Make your choices and experience your losses but do not be a victim.  Misery is a choice.
                                                                                         --Marion McCann

The Marbury Rexall Drugstore -- Est. 1883

There is a park bench across the street, come sit with me and let's look at this old building together. A lot of living has been done right here on this street corner and under that tarred-roof. I know some of the history, more than most living today but not all of it...and I never will.
Do you ever contemplate on a building or a traditional event or maybe a person in town that you really think you know a lot about?
If so, you will find a certain security in just knowing a place, a time, an event or a person...some of the knowledge never changes. It is truth and it is timeless.

The only things you catch changing are the facts....they change as more truth is unearthed to show its shining face and sometimes that is unsettling for lots of people. I prefer to stick with truth....and it better be the kind that can be told to everyone without hurting feelings, exposing criminal activity or adult mischief that ought not be happening.

No sir, no secret is totally safe with me. My aunt used to say that telling me a secret was like putting it in a sieve.

All these years later, I cannot/will not keep quiet about anything unusual or exciting --or out of order --or just plain secret.

In my personal world, I like all the cards of this  life laid out there on the table -face up. I want to know what everybody's hand looks like. In fairness,  I want them to know exactly what I have going on...I don't like competition, I like co-operation....work it all for the common good....I will cover your back, you cover mine...I won't let you fail; you protect me likewise....I won't let you down....even when you let me down.
I was taught honor and duty and pride and integrity and all the Godly virtues my parents held important in the post war years of affluence and the commonly held belief that if you were very, very good then God would reward you very, very much and when you got through living the wonderful life He made possible for you because you were so good, you would go straight to Heaven when you died. (I still believe this for the most part...when it seems to be failing, I start to course-correct and redirect my thinking and always wonder why I am amazed when immediately I see improvement. At my age, I am not changing what works for me...just excited to see what all will happen next if I keep trying to be a good person!)

As you are aware, every memorable story has a place at which the author can begin. In my family, not a one of us would choose the same point in time to start to layout the complex maze that directly effected our lives. It takes a lot of groundwork in any family to come to much of an understanding of just one century of the people we descended from and I am trying to reach into over 200 years of our ancestry and still won't be able tot tell you about all of them.

So, to understand what will eventually involve your heart and imagination if you choose to read much of my writing, you must embark with me on a more simple journey...a tour of my life.

Wait, don't go. I know I just got through having told you about the whole pie I was serving up! Now it seems I have switched it to just one piece left on your plate; but let me try to entice you to stay with me by promising you that if ever life at The Carrollwood was dull, I was nowhere on the premises.

First things first: In my opinion, I must tell you all I know about The Marbury Rexall Drugstore. The Carrollwood on the northwest side of town would not have been as I know it today if it had not evolved from this family business which was located at:
100 Park Avenue in beautiful downtown Ruston, Louisiana.

This address will remain a prominent one to me all the days of my life. (Having had a grandmother who had a propensity for the finer things life had to offer and money could buy...the address was what she termed "Swanky.")

In my elder years, I look at the address with a different observation than my young adult years and in my less than swank vocabulary, I announce, "This ain't Dallas, people!"

We are just small-town fodder and never were what you could call 'Uptown' --except in our own frame of reference. I sigh as I write, because it is probably the only important point I have made...where else does any thing like this matter except in our own little world!

Let me further expound: If it gave peace of mind to have believed that an address on the planet was a great one and we could bask in the certainty of God's blessings for us alone--then so be it and the Devil take tomorrow. (He can have it anyway, tomorrow never comes in my book.)

I admit, in my younger days, to entertaining ideas that if the store was ever to be closed down as a local pharmacy, I could call 100 Park Avenue my home address. I would have living space on the ground floor, my bedroom on the second and the top floor would be an artist's retreat with plenty of space for my various projects.

Reality was that when the time came, I was deeply entrenched in family life with 17 years of housewifery behind me, 4 teenagers at home with my husband and a budding career in freight distribution and brokerage. The fine old building was sold to some clever folks who renovated the second level of the 3 story downtown building as their own residence...even restored the lovely stained glass windows and opened a fabric shop on the ground floor...

Since all this happened during the days when I was driving 18-wheelers cross-country. I made it a point to go up 167North every time I left Baton Rouge with a tanker truck loaded with hazardous material bound for a place in Freedonia, KS. On that particular run, it put me through Ruston between 10 and 11pm on three nights out of the week. I would ease across the railroad tracks, mindful of trains but my mind on that building up on my left. At Christmas time, strange how this happens:  my mind's eye could see distinctly the life-size Santa Claus waving a friendly mittened hand from the storefront windows to all the passers-by.

I felt a certain envy for the new owners who were building their lives on top of the memories my family had made on that exact same piece of real estate. Being of vivid imagination, I envisioned the days of the store in the time my mother was growing up. I often wondered would the new owners enjoy knowing that my mama had donned roller-skates as a teen and zipped up and down the sidewalk with other pretty blonde haired girls after school...not for fun specifically--but that was how they delivered the fountain concoctions and burgers in those days before the war.

I am in memory lane mode now as I tell you how much Mama loved her roller-skates....used to joke with us about how she needed them later on when she and Daddy built their dream home in the countryside of northwest Ruston--what I now call "The Carrollwood"...a long, rambling affair. A "Ranch-Style" when the 50's made that type construction popular.....and when the new concept of whole-house air conditioning made it tolerable in the hot and humid, sunny South.

Always one to be less than satisfied with status-quo, I longed for a home with the grand style of the Old South...no less than 4 white columns...two-story and lots of gingerbread trim. Later in life, my father divulged that he too wished they had done something more traditional....especially when the heat of summer built up terribly high inside our home due to too much single pane, plate glass on the southern exposure and the un-insulated, low attic with barely any crawlspace for a regular size human to maneuver himself. This is a consideration one makes when checking electrical problems or in this modern day of installing fire and safety security systems.

The house did then and does now entrap us occupants with unruly greenhouse effect of three large picture windows....but the view of the large pond down the hill is breath-taking, serene and unmatched to our way of thinking. Our friends seem to share this opinion when they come sit and enjoy the view with us...it is not usually too long in just the looking that the menfolk ask if they can stroll down to the water and fish.

Jump back downtown, in future writing about days in the family business, I will post for your interest several early shots of the store. I will share with you whatever comes to mind of what life activities consisted of in the early years of my life and even before my birth according to the stories related to me and what the photos tell to you.

We will talk about the famous Dixie Theater up the street from the store on a future occasion....my grandfather was one of the several investors who built it. You will be fascinated with my version of the tale of how the chandelier fit for an opera house made its way to The Dixie.

Most small towns were much the same but all were unique due to the people who called them hometowns. I will endeavor to bring a sense of combined history shared by our hometown with photos as I find them.

For now, I will go ahead and enter the ramblings of the old lady I have become.... and begin a new topic...maybe my words will help to jog a memory of your own.